DragonBlog

Tedious Tasks...

I put up a post yesterday, over on Quick Shtick Writing, that I was in the process of shutting down commenting and trackbacks for all but the most recent entries into the current story. I'm still working on it. Despite his "guru" status around here when it comes to telling me how to handle the databases for the blogs, thus making the deletion of spam easier (usually), Brian could not help me find a way to mass change the database all at once. I wanted to just change some number settings that tell the program what it needs to know, but it turns out we can really only figure out how to do it one entry at a time. Although I can view them in batches of 30, so it's not nearly as difficult as what I'd have to do if I used the Movable Type program to do it instead of manipulating the database directly.

Still, I spent about two or three hours total today changing numbers and I still haven't finished. I think I've passed the halfway point, but I've still got some of the entries to change. I also still need to rebuild all the files to update the new information. While I won't finish the database work tonight (or I'll bloody well go MAD!!!), I will do the rebuild so that new comments can't pop up on the entries I've already changed. *sigh* What a whole lot of work because some asshole keeps dropping individual spam comments for sex sites and such with about eight or so different IP addresses onto our writing site. It's people like that that take some of the joy out of blogging for me. It's bad enough keeping up with the occasional spam influx on this blog, but QSW is set up to be four different blogs that all run off the same database. If I change one file, I have to rebuild all four blogs to reflect the change. That sucks, and I'm sick of doing it. From now on I'll only have 7 or so entries that could possibly have spam on them and only one blog that would require rebuilding because I won't need to change the files anymore. So I'm doing all this work now to save me work later on at least. I keep reminding myself of that.

In other news, the first of my jewelry classes ends on the 14th of December. I have to have all my work for the class finished and ready to present by then, so I'm going to need to work my butt off to get it done. The teacher has already given me some ideas on what to do to fix up the band ring I was having trouble with, and I've almost got one of my casting projects done. I have an entire other casting project (make it in wax, trap it in plaster, burn the wax out in a kiln, and shoot molten metal into it = casting project for those who aren't in the know) that I've only barely started. I need to get it finished and cast so I have time to clean it up! Eeek! I see myself as needing to stay after class at least one of the two days next week. I'm also hoping to use some time at home to do what I can outside of class. Wish me luck! I'm on a deadline now.

Yesterday I realized halfway to my doctor's appointment that I was driving on a flat tire. Since the appointment was time sensitive (I'd taken the prep drink for a glucose test to see if I've got the gestational diabetes this pregnancy like I did last time) I went the rest of the way there and called roadside assistance afterwards. We've been paying for that on our insurance for some time now, and it's the first time I've ever used it. Normally I don't wuss out and can change a damned tire on my own, but I was cold, pregnant and had my cranky (no nap!) two-year-old in tow so I was NOT about to try and deal with that situation on my own. With Brian being at a conference out of state for the day, I wasn't going to be able to get him to come bail my butt out, so I finally used the roadside assistance. They were nice, but it did take a bit of time both on hold on the phone and then waiting for the guy to come help me. I was just glad my spare was still in decent shape and the guy got me out of there quick. The receptionist at the hospital where my OB-GYN's office is at was really nice too, and let me use the information phone to place the call and have them call me back. She also let me know when she saw the tow truck pull up out front. Thanks!!!

I managed to get home just in time, as Jareth and I were having my sister-in-law, Lindsay over for dinner. Originally, she'd been scheduled to babysit for me because I was supposed to have had class, but since I'd switched schedules to the day class I didn't need babysitting anymore. However, with Brian still away for the day and evening (he didn't get in until late last night), I thought it would be fun if she still joined us for dinner and hung out for a while. I had a great time and we got a chance to chat a little, catching up on this and that. It was cool - something I don't get to do as often with her. She also helped us continue to make a dent in the turkey leftovers. Tomorrow - a week after Thanksgiving - we will FINALLY be done with them. We've already decided that if there happens to be anything left after dinner - it goes in the garbage as it probably shouldn't be eaten anymore beyond that. I think we've had quite enough turkey to last us for a while in this household. Next time I'm getting the little bird instead, or doing something entirely different. Sheesh!

Tomorrow is another jam-packed day, and I'm somehow still running after only getting about 3 hours of sleep last night. So I think I'll stop off here and try to head to bed early.

G'night!

Current Mood: busy

Two Years of Blogging...

We're coming up on the two-year mark. On December 2nd, 2003, I began blogging. Quick Shtick Writing began a couple months later, on February 11, 2004. Both have been posted to on a pretty regular basis for the time they've endured so far. I've also dabbled in some other blogs although not nearly as religiously. To Our Children's Children made a fair run of it, but has been temporarily set aside, mostly due to time constraints. I expect I'll pick it up again sometime after the next child is born. I do still want to finish my half of it. Brian stopped doing it well before I did. Mostly there's enough other stuff that needs doing in the morning and TOCC can take up a goodly amount of time on some of the more complex questions.

Last year, I think I forgot to post anything on the actual anniversary of my blog starting until after the date had passed, so I figured I'd get this mention of it in early instead of having something else come up.

The pros and cons of blogging so far have been generally in favor of doing it, although the spam issue persists. The version of MT I use seemed to have some issues when I attempted to install the blacklist at one point, so I was unable to make use of that tool. I have learned, however, how to mass delete the spam from the database directly, and I take a few measures that help reduce the sheer amount of it altogether at least. Recently, someone has been harassing Quick Shtick with about 10 - 15 spam comments per day, which basically causes me to have to rebuild the site each of the 3-5 times I check it during the day. It helps that the blog e-mails me when a comment or trackback shows up, and I check my e-mail pretty regularly when I'm at home. It's annoying enough, however, that I've been considering disabling comments for a while, just to give myself a break. Most of the time, the spam shows up in big blocks, generated by an automated program that utilizes a file on my site. I regularly change that file to prevent as much as possible, but knowing how to manipulate the database (thanks Brian! He's the database guru around here) has helped TONS in mass deleting the damned things. It was very painful before, when I had to delete each comment one at a time.

The gallery has been a nice improvement this past year, I think, allowing me to peruse through the pictures I have posted on the blog thus far, as well as include extra pictures of events now and again - usually from group stuff so that the other parents I was with can see the pictures I got of their kids too. I'd love to do more stuff with it, like set up a section for just "artistic" pictures I've taken, but again - time is the issue. If I had the time to do everything I wanted to each day, then there would be at least 48 hours in the day, probably more. I am constantly thinking up cool projects I'd love to do, but am swamped enough to begin with.

PaganParents.com has been one of those projects, sadly. While I still have plans to finish it, and a redesign in progress to make it look far more snazzy than the basic site I threw up to have something there, the project itself has continued to take a back burner to motherhood, school, housework, remodelling, de-cluttering, and a slew of other things that hold far more priority right now. I fear that it might not get finished until sometime maybe next summer. When class ends and winter break begins I will need to focus on getting the room for the baby ready. When spring break comes it will be right around the same time that I give birth. And while class is going, it takes priority over any non-professional (professional being "paying" or "bartered") web design I do. I haven't even updated my "professional" site to show that I've been doing more web design recently than the other stuff I have up there either. In fact, it's in sad shape, all things considered.

I like to think my writing has gotten a bit better over the course of the time I've been blogging. While I still tend to ramble off my ass a bit here, I have learned to make some of what I have to say come out in a slightly more concise manner. Maybe not as much as I ought, but part of what I do here is meant to be more like an open diary. I write like I talk. In some cases, I write like I wish I would talk, as I so often keep my mouth shut when I really should say what's on my mind. This is my little venting space, and I use it thus. That's pissed a couple people off in the course of it, but then I can't always expect people to interpret what I write the same way it came out in my head before my fingers hit the keys. Especially if they aren't in the same headspace as I am when I'm composing it. *shrug* I can't please all the people all the time, and I decided during that first year of blogging that I didn't want to blog for other people. I blog what *I* want to blog. If others find enjoyment reading it - that's all the more gratifying. Not only that, but I want to take down the memories of my children in the process. For them, just as much as for myself.

If nothing else, they'll have something easy to print out and hand to their therapists one day.

I could go on. Ramble on about blogging a bit more. But really, I just want to say that I'm excited I've kept going this long. I look forward to seeing if I make it yet another year here in the blogsphere.

G'night!

Current Mood: nostalgic

Cleaned Up and Dressed Up...

First, I submit my proof that my 2 1/2 year-old son helped us clean house the day before Thanksgiving!

Brian even showed him how to hold the cord out of the way of the machine with his other hand too! Wow!

Then, Thanksgiving day, both Jareth and Brian got dressed up all spiffy.

And yes, I did crop myself out of that last picture. It was the best shot of the two of them, however MY expression looks somewhat psychotic for some reason! I sense some "editing" that will need to happen before we pop a picture into the yearly newsletter. But my guys look great, don't they? Awwww...

And, again, I wore red. I didn't plan to wear red for the newsletter pictures this year. I always seem to be wearing some version of red in them lately. I wanted to wear blue. But none of the blue stuff I have looked quite the way I wanted it to. So I wore red again this year. *sigh* A closet stuffed full of clothes and nothing to wear. At least, right now, I have an excuse for that - as a lot of my clothes aren't fitting right due to the pregnancy. I've got pregnancy clothes and regular clothes both stuffed in together, since I don't have anywhere to go with the regular clothes for a few months anyway. After the pregnancy, I'll have space in my closet again. And a lot more options for wardrobe.

Okay, that's all for today!

G'night!

Current Mood: pleased

Thankfully...

The question of "What are you thankful for?" came up on a mom's message board I am on. I thought I'd share my response here as well:

I am thankful for my husband, who is my best friend, my lover, and the one who takes care of me when the chips are down.

I am thankful for my son, who is my "little helper" these days and, simply put, the joy of my life.

I am thankful for the life growing inside me, kicking and spinning around and reminding me that I'm not always such a "tomboy" after all. Bearing a child is such an amazing feat that only a woman can achieve. I can't wait to meet this little person who has chosen me to be "mommy" to them.

I am thankful I have a roof over my head and food on the table when there are so many in the world who can't boast of such luxuries.

I am thankful there is no war here, when there are places where people live in fear of bombs and soldiers on a daily basis.

I am thankful that there is a program in place (KidCare) in this state that will help me have this child without going bankrupt from having no insurance.

I am thankful for friends and family, both near and far.

I am thankful for my strength of faith. Though my spiritual beliefs may differ from most others, sometimes it is the believing that is most important. That knowledge of something bigger than me keeps me humble and yet strengthens me when times seem hard.

Maybe more blog later...

Current Mood: grateful

Thanksgiving...

Well, despite a smaller attendance than originally anticipated, Thanksgiving was a fun event as always. Sometimes I think I married my husband for his family! I certainly know that it had a definite impact on the idea of a marriage actually working - my own background wasn't exactly filled with warm, happy relationship models. Brian, on the other hand, has parents who are not only still together after all these years, but he and his sister even get along with both each other AND their parents!!!

It boggles the mind, really.

Brian's aunt and uncle who live in Illinois joined us as well. While we don't get to see them as often as we might like, since they live nearly a couple hours away, we always enjoy a chance to see them. That's one of the nice things about the holidays, over the course of just a couple of months you get to catch up with a whole bunch of family that you may only see once or twice otherwise throughout the year. Most people tend to dread this - I used to be one of them - but Brian's family is the coolest, and I look forward to these events. Sometimes it will seem like a lot of work to put together Thanksgiving, or to bundle everyone up for a drive out to someone's house, but in the end it is always a wonderful, rewarding experience.

My own uncle, who I was looking forward to having over since I get to see him so rarely, came down with the stomach flu and was unable to come after all. This basically meant it was us and Brian's relatives in attendance, as my sister chose to avoid all family this year again and share Thanksgiving with some family friends instead. Since she has been one of the prime people to condemn my journal-style blogging here, I will refrain from commenting on my feelings about that. She knows how I feel. We'll just leave it at that. In fact, I'll stop talking about that situation now, as I keep having to delete the end of this paragraph...

*pauses for a moment to console the unborn child who senses mommy's tension*

As always, I tend to try and compensate for all potential possiblities and put together WAY more food than we needed. In fact, with others having brought food as well, we probably could have fed more than twice the people we had with all that food. Brian and I will be eating leftovers for most of a week!

I didn't eat any lunch yesterday, but then filled up somewhat on appetizers before I began the last-minute cooking that needed to be done. Between all those appetizers and the flurry of getting everything to the final stage for serving, I ended up having next to no appetite when it came time to actually eat the dinner itself. I pointedly tried to taste everything, so I'd at least know if something turned out horrible (and could thus apologize!) but it seemed as if everything was all good in the end.

I know that Brian already mentioned it on his blog too, but I have to thank his mom for helping with cleaning up afterwards. THANK YOU!!! Between cleaning house and pre-cooking stuff the day before, and the bazillion and four last minute things that needed doing Thanksgiving Day, I hit the end of the night and was petering out pretty completely. Where I normally try to protest and kick everyone else out of the kitchen to go socialize while I clean up, I kinda just gave in last night. Thanksgiving can normally be a bit of a production, but doing it while pregnant was a bit more than my back and hips were ready for, really. The preventative Tylenol I had taken before people had arrived had pretty much worn off by then too. Brian, himself, was a saint to handle most of the serious cleaning beforehand, and what his mom didn't do afterwards he took care of as well. There was an amazingly small amount of stuff left (mostly empty the dish drainer and the dishwasher of the clean dishes and put them away) for me to do in the end. I was really blown away by how much he took care of for me this year.

Jareth helped us clean house too! He's at this stage where he wants to do everything we do, and I'm trying to take that into account and find ways to let him participate when I can. On Wednesday, while Brian was cleaning, I heard him having to tell Jareth "NO!" every five minutes as our little boy tried to grab up one of the spray bottles of cleaning stuff and "help" his daddy in some way. I was in the kitchen, cutting and prepping stuff for Thursday's dinner and I had an idea. I grabbed an old spray bottle I had with 1/4 solution of some cleaner or other in it that was nearly gone anyway, and cleaned it out really thoroughly, rinsing it out and squirting water through it until I was sure it was clear of anything nasty. I then squirted it dry, not wanting him running around squirting water on everything either, and grabbed an old dishtowel that we now use for dusting and stuff. These became Jareth's "cleaning supplies" as he followed Brian around, spraying and wiping places that Brian told him he could clean. It worked like magic! The little guy was pleased as punch. (although he did keep trying to call my bluff and get me to give him more "water" in his squirtbottle to spray with - I told him his was "special cleaning stuff" and he usually bought it after a little coaxing.)

He also helped Brian with the vacuum too. I didn't believe it until I saw it, as our vacuum cleaner is heavy, but it also has a "drive" function that helps it move along the carpet once you start pushing. I'm told he vacuumed most of the family room, with Brian supervising and helping him not get stuck in corners. He absolutely loved it, and when Brian pulled the vacuum out again on Thursday morning for a last-minute touchup on one area, Jareth got downright pissed off when his daddy didn't let him help!

I think I'd better enjoy our "little helper" now, while he's excited about it. I know that one day I'll probably have to beg, bribe, or pull teeth just to get my kid to do a chore! But, for now, he's totally thrilled when he can help out. It is SO adorable!

I do have a picture of him with the vacuum. I may put it up, but I'm also looking to put up a picture of him in the little suit we had on him for Thanksgiving too. He looked so cute! It's a little shirt, vest, pants, and bow tie getup and while it didn't stay tucked in for very long, he was just the hansomest little guy ever wearing it! I haven't gotten around to uploading the pictures off my camera yet though, so maybe tomorrow or the next day I'll put them up. Today was my "lazy day" where I didn't do much more than put away the aforementioned remaining clean dishes and nap when Jareth did. Tomorrow I plan to be at least a smidge more productive. Probably. Well, maybe. We'll just see what happens, eh?

Well, this post is getting a tad lengthy, so I think I'll stop here.

G'night!

Current Mood: lazy

What calm before the storm? There was CALM? Damn! I missed it!

I haven't been at my computer much the last couple days. Really, I've only been able to sit here long enough to do my Quick Shtick Writing post and check my e-mail. Blogging on this blog just hasn't been possible...

Sunday, we were over at Brian's folks house, celebrating Lindsay's birthday. One of the projects I had been working on finishing up in the days prior to that was the gift I was making for her - a set of hemp and bead jewelry. I had promised her I'd make her a necklace ages ago and kept having to apologize that I hadn't gotten to it yet. She had suggested a couple months ago that with her birthday coming I could just wait and do it for her then.

On one hand, a wonderful idea! A gift personally made by me, for her, that was something she even asked for? How perfect! The only trick was my guilt complex. Having made her wait so long after promising it shortly after I'd started doing the hemp stuff meant that I couldn't let myself get off that easy and just do a necklace anymore. Thus, I did a set instead with matching bracelet and earrings. I'd also never done the particular knotting pattern I'd chosen (I wanted something a little more elaborate than the basic square knots and with a feminine feel to it) so I did one necklace first, as a test run to make sure I got good enough at the knotting style to make something worthwhile.

She likes it (PHEW!) and it was suggested on Sunday that I drop one of the pictures I'd taken of the finished set here on the blog, so here it is:

We had a great time with the family and Lindsay's boyfriend Scott (the one she shares the blog with). I honestly think that the fact that we've had to skim the Sunday dinners down to just one a month has made us all appreciate the time together that much more. It was tough to head out the door at the end of the night. It seemed like we just had so much fun catching up that none of us really wanted to break up the gathering even though we all had stuff the next day that required we get to bed at a reasonable hour.

Monday I had class in the morning, and RainMoon took charge of Jareth for the duration. It looks like that is going to work out wonderfully - it was obvious that Jareth had a great time! Monday afternoon was taken up with errands. Which involved the two-hour excursion to the grocery store, where I bought the turkey and all the fixings I need to make Thanksgiving a proper day of feasting. Well, all but one. I had "mom's night out" that evening with RainMoon (there were supposed to be others, but the group isn't too good with the RSVP thing yet so it ended up just us two girls gabbing over food loaded with yummy calories instead, but was still totally fun!), and then afterwards I took a quick jaunt to another store and picked up the chicken livers that my store had been out of. If there's anything else left that I have forgotten - well, it's just plain likely we ain't eatin' whatever it was, unless it's something vital to the stuffing. I do NOT want to ask Brian to run out and grab some last-minute item while I'm trying to cook over the next two days.

Today was all about the cutting of hairs. We all had appointments, although Brian got stuck in traffic and ended up having to reschedule his for tomorrow morning instead. I got mine first, and then we headed over to a place that I go to for Jareth that specializes in kid's haircuts. They not only do a great job on his hair, but they have seats shaped like cars and play movies (you choose from their selection) to distract the kid while they are cutting. It works out great. I feel like the cut he got today made him look a little older though, which makes me already pine for my "little" boy. He may not even be 3 yet, but I still feel like he's growing up too fast! Not TOO too fast though - he let me snuggle with him on our couch later today, after lunch. I'll just CRY when my little boy gets old enough to not want to snuggle anymore.

Tomorrow is cleaning day. I have class in the morning, and then we embark on the great preparation for Thanksgiving, where the house gets cleaned and tidied, and as much pre-cooking is done as possible. I like to leave myself with as little to do on the actual holiday as possible, as I know I'll somehow manage to do too much as it is.

So I might not have time to blog here again until Thursday or Friday. We'll see. I'm just warnin' ya now.

If I don't get a chance to though - I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving! If you're driving somewhere - drive safe and alert - there's plenty of people who will be out on the road. Some of them are coming to MY house and I'd like them to get to and fro intact please. I'm sure others feel the same way. That's all the PSA I'll throw in for today. Let the feasting begin!

G'night!

Current Mood: busy

The Future of Blogging in a Snapshot...

I suddenly felt inclined to whip out the camera again today, to capture Jareth. I set up a couple other shortcuts on his computer for him. While he enjoys the other learning game we recently introduced him to, I've also shown him the wonders of "paint" and "wordpad." Today he played with both, not even bothering with the learning game. He giggles something silly when he presses the keys and can recognize some of the letters as they show up on the keyboard. He seems particularly fond of the "W" and presses that one the most. I sense a future blogger in training...

Brian and I have decided that the caption for this one is something along the lines of "Don't worry mom, I'll send you a link when I'm done!" We found ourselves scoping out web domains to see what we might get him when he's old enough to blog himself! Unfortunately, jareth.com is already taken until 2014. Since we're not likely to be able to wait until he is 11 years old before he'll want a domain name, I've scoped out some alternatives. One that Brian thought of has cool potential, but I won't put it here as I wouldn't want anyone to buy it up just to be mean. I'm still trying to decide if we're willing to fork out actual money each year to secure a domain name for a two-year-old. The fact that I'm considering it, however, just goes to show how far down the "geek" path I have ambled.

The other one I liked best of the pics I took today was this one, which I just felt was "whimsical."

Later today we're going to have dinner with Brian's folks, and celebrate Lindsay's birthday finally. Mmmm. Cake. And a welcomed respite from cooking before the huge flurry of it I will need to do next week. Thanksgiving is Thursday and I still don't have a clue how many people will be there yet. *sigh* I guess I'll end up cooking for a horde and then have enough leftovers that my next child will be born sprouting turkey feathers and yam roots. Oof. That would suck, actually. I'm allergic to feathers.

It's unlikely there will be more later, as I still have to finish that project for class (I'm having "sculpter's block"? with the jewelry wax!) and then roll out of bed early tomorrow morning to actually go there.

G'night!

Current Mood: amused

Daddy's Little Boy...

Sometimes, when my son looks at me, he so has his daddy's eyes...

Busy yesterday. Busy today. Maybe I'll find time to blog more later. Who knows.

Later!

Current Mood: loved

He calls it 'nastics...

Because of the total change in schedules around here, I took Jareth to his gymnastics class today. It's been a long, long time since I took him, as Brian had expressed some jealousy that I was getting to take Jareth to "all the fun stuff" so I signed Jareth up for gymnastics at times Brian could take him to. I'm hoping they offer a Wednesday class next session, so that Brian can do it again, but for now I'm finishing up with him for this session. Basically, that means I took him tonight and I'll take him once more the week after Thanksgiving. After that, this session is over. I still have to wait for the booklet to come, outlining the class schedule for the park district next session, so we'll see what their scheduling is for winter.

It was really wierd being there. The teachers recognized Jareth right off, as did some of the other parents, but *I* felt a little out of place. Partly the class was run by two different teachers than the ones who'd been running it back when I was taking Jareth. Partly - all these people had seen Brian there with Jareth. I know my husband well enough to know that when he warms up a little he can be very charming. Jareth gets that from him too. I guess I just went in with this concept in my mind that everyone who saw me would make some sort of comparison between myself and my husband - trying to match us up in their minds as a couple, and perhaps raising an eyebrow at why the "charming, handsome, skinny guy" is with the "beached whale."

I had no way of knowing if any of them knew I was pregnant or not, but doubted it. Brian may be charming, but he's not the type to offer information up without prompting. I did mention it to one person, when I didn't want them to think I was just fat and lazy when I was starting to get pooped out from running around after Jareth and helping him to do all the different activities. Most of the clothes I wear right now don't make it obvious that I'm pregnant. I like oversized, comfy stuff to begin with, so unless you noticed that I'm wearing maternity jeans, you might just think I was getting overweight instead. *sigh* It's a stage in the pregnancy that annoys me - not quite "round" enough in the tummy to be obviously pregnant, but bulged out enough that you don't fit into any of your pants anymore. Hence my "beached whale" outlook on myself at the moment. I'll be more pleased when I'm bulging out so that it looks like I might just pop!

I'd been careful to keep somewhat inactive earlier in the day as it was - I knew I'd have problems otherwise - and worked on projects that kept me sitting down (mostly jewelry-related stuff today). While I walked out of there a bit tired and with an aching back, I did manage to keep my leg from twisting any, so my hip didn't bugger out on me at least. I was worried, since it nearly went out on me last night at one point when I woke up to go to the bathroom. The area at the foot of our bed is so narrow I have to walk sideways to get by, which doesn't make it easier on the hip at all.

Jareth, I noticed, is only showing a little improvement in attention span and behavior since I was taking him. I know that Brian had mentioned he'd been doing better last session and then went downhill again when they started this session in the larger, evening class instead. He was intermittently shy and uncooperative, although I could usually coax him into doing something that resembled what he was supposed to be doing. Brian has suggested that he'd be better off having class during the daytime again, before nap. Evenings tend to be more difficult than the rest of the day, so I have to agree. I'm seriously planning for next session to be a daytime one, even if it doesn't happen to fall on the day that Brian can take him. Maybe there's another class we can sign up for on Wednesdays that Brian can take him to - something new. We'll just have to see.

Anyways, that's all for now. I've either got to get myself to bed, or get back to working on the projects I've got going at the moment. One of which is for class, and I really want ready on Monday. They are on a slightly different curriculum than my night class was, and have started one project that we were only just about to start. As a result, I need to get a piece of wax carved out into a shape so that I can get it ready for casting next week. I've got the image in my head of what I want it to look like, but haven't really had a ton of experience carving stuff out of anything before. I never actually took a specifically "sculpting" class. Let's hope it remotely resembles what I have in mind when I'm done.

G'night!

Current Mood: busy

UPDATE: So I decided to stay up a while and work on the wax carving project some. While I made some progress, I also managed to cut myself twice AND leave several little slices in the band-aid I put over the first (and worst) of the cuts. I think I'd better put my Exacto knife away and go to bed before I hit a vein! Eep! At least the second cut was just a nick, really, and has already stopped the teensy bit of bleeding it did. It hurt when it happened - the first one was a slice into my thumb which I didn't notice until I saw the blood...

The Winds of Change...

Phew. I say again: Phew!

Things are working themselves out, despite the chaos that recently began to coalesce around me.

Brian kicked me into gear to call someone and see if there wasn't something I could do about my jewelry class. The people at his job had also suggested to him that it would be better if he were taking one full day off during the week instead of the two half days he's been doing to cover my night class. Since he normally wouldn't get home from work until 7pm and I leave for class around 5pm, he was taking those two days as half off in the afternoon, thus leaving the only full day off being on Sundays.

Now it looks like he's going to have Wednesdays off and I'm going to switch to the daytime (read "ungodly early in the freaking morning till about noon") class for the remainder of the semester. I think. I have to confirm all this with the teacher tomorrow, but he has made it sound on the phone like it's a sure thing.

Of course the class is on Mondays and Wednesdays. Brian having Wednesday off covers that day, but does nothing for Monday. The idea of using the daycare they have at the college came into play, but they won't take him this late in the semester and they require that I bring him in for at least TWO times per week, not just the one. They also mentioned that it's more of a preschool, which is all well and good but we plan to homeschool - not let some stranger teach him without far more thorough investigation into said stranger than I have time for right now anyway. So, instead, we've moved to plan B. While Jareth won't get the added benefit of playing with a bunch of other kids (which was the only real draw to daycare in the first place other than the obvious function of leaving me free for class), he will get to be watched over by someone I already know and trust - RainMoon. It's what she does for a living anyway, and she's being a sweetie by cutting me a deal for her services since we're on a tight budget right now.

Tomorrow, I meet the teacher and make sure this is all going to work out. I'll also need to figure out what happens next semester too, as I'll be popping out a baby in March and thus need at least some recovery time afterwards. Then again, slipping off to a jewelry class might seem relaxing in those first few weeks. As long as I'm not drifting off to sleep in the lab, that is. There's also spring break, which ought to happen not too far off from when I have the baby, so that would give me recovery time and not set me back further in class. I need to ask the teacher if I can take the next Jewelry class in line, or if I should take an independent study or take the semester off entirely. I really don't want to take the semester off though - I want to keep constant on this so I don't forget anything and set myself back again. I'm already feeling like I came into this not remembering nearly enough from the stuff I'd learned years ago.

In other news, I've been meaning to drop a link to the Rockin' Ralph blog here. While I love Ralph's World, and have followed Ralph Covert and The Bad Examples for years (hell, I was in High School when I first heard of them), I am not sure what to make of "Rockin' Ralph." On one hand, it looks to be good, cute fun. On the other hand... it almost scares me a little. Flashbacks from those damned Chucky movies I guess. Although I only ever watched the first one. Then had nightmares that all my sister's Cabbage Patch dolls were gonna come try and get me... eep!

Last, but certainly not least, my sister-in-law had a birthday today!

I figured I'd do pink, since she's SO much better at being a "girl" than I'll ever be. If this baby I'm carrying is a girl, then she's gonna have to go to her Aunt Lindsay as one of her resources for learning all about makeup and that other "girl stuff." I'm such a tomboy.

Anyway, shortly after I post this, I'll put up the permanent link in the sidebar to Lindsay and her boyfriend Scott's blog too. Brian's all excited because he beat me to it and has it up on his already. Time to burst his bubble - *POP*. Then I'll go snuggle into bed (where he is) and... well, actually I'll try to sleep seeing as how I have to get up at an ungodly hour in the morning.

G'night!

Current Mood: accomplished

The Dusty Blog Bones In Our Closets...

Brian finally owned up to his anonymous blog, KillingTime. I've been waiting for quite some time for him to decide what he was going to do with that. Mostly because I had an anonymous blog too, made purely as a result of his. It took a while, and many heated and interesting discussions around this house, before I finally created an anonymous identity with which I could leave comments on his anonymous blog. Because, honestly, I couldn't stand the idea that NO ONE had commented about the morality of the character he was portraying there. I felt that there ought to be someone calling on him to explain himself, to account for his "actions" whether fictional or not. I think the tricky part was separating myself (as in the part of me that knew it was a experiment in characterization and fiction) and my views of the character. Creating another identity helped me to do that. Because, in all fairness, I would NEVER put my real name out there on a blog that I wasn't sure about. I'm anything BUT anonymous here on this blog. It probably wouldn't be hard to track me down if someone really wanted to (although why they would want to is beyond me!). So putting my real name down, commenting on a self-proclaimed hit man's blog? Nuh-uh! Especially not when he supposedly lives in "Chicago" and I'm living in just a couple hours of driving distance from there. No fucking way!

So I created WriterGirlBlue to be my voice. I didn't change my personality, nor my standings and morals while posting under that name. Merely my identity. Mostly to help keep the suspension of disbelieve for him (linking back to me could also have allowed his readers an easier chance of figuring him out), and also to play along in-character with the idea that I didn't know it was really fiction. I also wanted to see someone challenge him - make him work to make sure the character was believeable. After all, if he was going to pick such a "morally flexible" persona to portray, he ought to have to put some effort into it. I was afraid his other readers were going too easy on him. There were more conversations about his "cat Walther" and his "mom" than the fact that he killed people for money for a living. That just didn't sit well with me.

I used the blog itself as more of a "rant board" than anything else. This blog tends to be more of a personal journal than a political soapbox, partly as I tend to try and see both sides of an argument and frequently have a hard time taking a stand either way. That made it difficult to post with any regularity on WriterGirlBlue, as I don't have a lot of issues where I can stand up and say "that's right, this is wrong, and I can't see any other way around it." Too many of life's troubles have enough gray area for me to insist that mine is the only opinion that ought to be heard. I ended up having a difficult time adequately explaining that when it came to the Pro Life / Pro Choice issue. While I would never abort or give up a child if I were to become pregnant unwillingly (my current pregnancy was, as most know, happily anticipated), I can understand that there are some reasons where a woman might choose not to go through with a pregnancy. I've known people who've been in such circumstances, and I don't begrudge them their right to make that choice. I could give examples, but that's not what this blog post is about. Maybe I'll delve further into it at another time.

Another topic I broached on WriterGirlBlue was about the murder of children. I just have trouble wrapping my mind around the concept (or maybe I just don't want to be able to understand) of how a person could willfully murder their own child. Yeah, I'll get frustrated and irritated at my kid from time to time, but I would NEVER allow myself to get that angry at him! Some of the news stories I read left me so emotionally distraught I wanted to throw up!

I am careful about reading the news. I rarely watch it. Usually I hear about something going on through someone else first (often Brian) and I look it up on CNN.com or some other news webpage to get some solid information. But, you see, once I start - I can't stop. I keep digging, until I find pictures or read something worse. I remember 9-11 - Brian called to tell me to turn on the TV and I sat on the couch in front of it for the remainder of the day, my mouth half open in shock and horror as I watched the towers fall. I find I become far too empathic when I read or see such events. I can't drive by an accident on the roadside where an ambulance has arrived without a chill running down my spine and my eyes trying to tear up. That's just how I am. So I try to limit how much I expose myself or I'd be a blubbering wreck all the time and no good to anyone. In the end, this also limited how much I posted on WriterGirlBlue. I tried scoping out the news for tidbits to rant about. I just can't do it with any regularity. I'd far rather comment on the things in life that effect me as I go through my daily routines than search out stuff to be upset about. It's just not worth the emotional drain.

Anyway, there's my own admission of anonymous bloggage. While originally a tool to help me comment on KillingTime, (a KT "fan site", he tried to call it! LOL!) I did find out some more about myself along the way. I think it made the posts I do here feel more rewarding and more "me" just from the act of being anonymous and trying something different there. So I guess it, too, was an experiment in a way. Just not one of fiction.

Of course, what I really ought to do is a sex blog. But there's just so many out there that it's almost cliché! And THAT'S not something I could later print out and show to my kids...

And, as for the pages I put together for Brian's writing projects? Well, yeah, they took me longer than expected. Mostly because he went and put all the content in MS Word first and something always seems to go wonky when you try and just to a cut/paste from Word into web software. I'd remove something stupid, like a line-break in the code and it would change all manner of things it oughtn't have changed. I was baffled for about half of the time. Next time I'll make him give me printed copy and I'll just type it directly into the web page itself. It'd take less time!

Well, that's all for now. Gotta go drop a post in on WriterGirlBlue, linking back to here and then play some mindless computer game to wind down before bed. 'Cause my mind is whirling right now and I need to make it sleepy.

G'night!

Current Mood: contemplative

Another post on The Walker...

There hasn't been much to post about on The Walker as of late, but he had not been forgotten. He's been bundling back up again as the weather changes and we're seeing more and more of the hat he wears. Thursday, however, there was an interesting moment when Brian and I came home after the ultrasound and a run to a store, when I happened to see The Walker on a bike!

Now, perhaps it's just because I've dubbed him "The Walker" in my own little world here, but it just seemed... well... wrong to see this guy on a bicycle. I mean... he walks everywhere. Doesn't he? It would probably be even weirder, however, if I were to ever stop at a stoplight and look over to find the guy driving a car or something...

Then, just yesterday, I saw him walking along the side of one of the bigger streets just outside the neighborhood. That, in and of itself, was not at all surprising. I've seen him at the other end of the neighborhood before, which is a decent enough distance for anyone who's not accustomed to walking on a daily basis. The odd part was that I saw him walking with someone. He seemed to be chatting with the guy too!

The Walker has friends too? Well shit! Now he's going to start developing a personality next. I have always seen him walking alone prior to that point. It's not that I didn't think the guy must have some friends, it's just that I didn't think he went walking with them.

Whatever will happen next? The "saga" continues...

In other news, my sister-in-law and her boyfriend have started a blog together. Sidebar link coming soon, once I get to it. Family doesn't just get stuck in the blogroll, they get a real link on the other side! Anyway, check 'em out and give them a break, as they're just getting started in this whole blogging thing.

G'night!

Current Mood: curious

Now introducing the next member of my little family...

Heeeeeeeeeeerrrre's BABY!

The woman who did the scan said she's "definitely leaning towards a girl" after much prodding and trying to get my apparently modest little one to reveal what gender she? is. I have been informed that I am at 22 weeks and have a due date of March 16th. Sounds like it's time for me to get myself one of those countdown thingies and pop it up on my sidebar finally. It was surprisingly not far off from the March 19th date I had originally been given by the doctors.

Despite the fact that my kid kept her? legs crossed, there was some "showing off" for the rest of the scan. We got to see arms, legs, spine, heart, the works - far more than I think Jareth really showed off. He kept trying to crawl further back inside me and hide when they scanned him.

The only issue so far is that the baby is in there upside down - breech - at the moment. For now, this just means I'll get scheduled for another ultrasound at some point to make sure the little one flips into position properly. I was told there is plenty of room in there right now for spinning around, so I don't need to worry about it just yet. I stress myself out over enough stuff that I'll let this one slide until later. I'm more concerned about next month's appointment when I'll be tested for the gestational diabetes - something I had during the pregnancy with Jareth. I'd better get any further chocolate or marshmallow peeps fixations out of my system now - just in case.

Jareth still has no real clue that in March his life as he knows it will be utterly changed by the arrival of a new little human being in our house. I had hoped to see some glimmer of recognition that the picture on the screen was of a person and that the thing on my tumy was generating it. While he did look like he made the connection that the thing on my tummy was generating the image, he didn't seem to understand yet that the image was of his coming baby sibling. However, he was happy - the nurses liked him so much they gave him loot! There was a box of goodies under someone's desk and they let him have a whistle-thing, a clacker-thing, some stickers, and a rubber snake. I think he was going to get just one, but he pulled out the cuteness card again and said "thank you" which melts most people when they encounter him. Now why can't he just be that polite when *I* ask him to do something? Like take the nap he's supposed to be having right now?

As for names? We're still perplexed on what to name the baby if they are wrong and it's a boy instead. The current top of the list for a girl is "Kayla Evina", meaning "beloved young warrior." If she truely is a girl in there, we shall see if the name endures until her birth, or if it gets changed or tweaked along the way. While Jareth's name remained the same throughout, I make no guarantees either way.

That's all for now. Maybe more later, maybe not. In case there isn't, I'll end with the usual...

G'night!

Current Mood: jubilant

The Baby Name Game and Other Goings-Ons...

Okay, so we've hit the deadline right? I was hoping to have names picked out by the time I had the ultrasound, which is TOMORROW MORNING! As it is so far, when Brian headed to bed tonight we still only had eight possible names (some more likely to be middle names than first names) and only TWO of those are even boys names! I'm not going to list them out here just yet, as we've resolved to talk about it more at breakfast. Since my instruction sheet for the ultrasound reminded me to actually eat a "full breakfast" (whatever that is - it's probably not the usual bowl of oatmeal I've been having lately) three hours before the appointment, I've instructed my dear husband to roll my ass out of bed early and take me and our son out to breakfast. We never get to do that anymore, as his only full day off is on Sunday and NOBODY IN THEIR RIGHT MIND tries to get breakfast at a restaurant on a Sunday morning. Once all them durn churches let out, there ain't a seat to be had!

We scheduled the appointment to happen on one of the two days per week Brian only normally works half the day as it is, due to my class, so he won't miss as much work over it. Instead, he's got the whole day off and can take me to breakfast! Yay! Then, later on, I'll ditch him and Jareth to run off to class and such before they head out to the weekly gymnastics fiasco class that Jareth has. Apparently Jareth isn't doing as well behavior-wise in the class as last time. I'm not sure what to do about it precisely, although if I switch to morning classes the next time I take jewelry class, they might be able to switch as well. Jareth seems to do better in the smaller, daytime classes than the big evening one I guess. Then again, he's been having the occasional behavior problems at home too, which I still attribute to the "terrible twos." It's an adjustment period we'll need to get through and eventually we'll get to the other end of it. Overall, he's still a remarkably good little boy, he just gets stubborn and finicky sometimes. And he's MY kid, so that's BOUND to happen now and again regardless. The kid is becoming a pain in the butt to feed dinner to, but he'll devour the instant oatmeal I make for breakfast with no complaints. I'm holding out on just feeding him oatmeal for ALL his meals. I mean c'mon! He didn't want PIZZA bread tonight! Normally Jareth LOVES pizza and asks for it far more often than I'm willing to even consider serving it!

*shrugs unknowningly*

I guess that when I was little I went through a Chef Boyardee stage myself. I wouldn't eat anything that didn't come out of one of their cans. My mother was furious. I haven't heard about Brian doing anything like that specifically, but his mom did call their pediatrician once to find out how long it was safe to keep serving the same dish of food over and over again to his sister until she finally ate it! So I guess it's safe to say that "finicky" runs thick in Jareth's blood. So far we're just withholding any snacks or dessert (since he still has Halloween candy left) if he doesn't eat at least a certain amount on his plate, but our patience is growing thinner...

Anyway, more tomorrow or Friday at the latest. I'm hoping the pictures from the ultrasound turn out scanworthy, as Jareth's did. If so, I'll have to post one here.

G'night!

Current Mood: hopeful

Sex and Pregnancy...

From a conversation today:

Me: "Look at that! The way it's laying there... It just looks so...tragic!"

Him: "Don't worry, I'll still love you forever even with your tragic breasts."

Some things about pregnancy are just not flattering or helpful when one is trying to maintain a healthy sex life with one's spouse. I have been "showing" more and more lately, which means my hips are wider, my boobs are bigger (yes, I do know that most people would consider that part a blessing, but I'm "endowed" enough to begin with, thankyouverymuch), and parts of me are bulging out and stretching so that I no longer fit comfortably into my "fat pants" anymore. Yes, it's true boys. Women have "fat pants." These are the blue jeans we don't admit are actually "fat pants" until AFTER we've lost the weight and they drop off our hips with barely a tug. And if you are a wise, wise husband indeed, you NEVER EVER UNDER PENALTY OF CERTAIN DEATH AND/OR DISMEMBERMENT mention it to a woman if she starts wearing her "fat pants" again after having put them in a drawer months or even years past. You smile and tell her she looks lovely. Just trust me.

There's another little thing that's interrupting our sex life however. Something other than my overall "MY GOD, I LOOK LIKE A BEACHED WHALE!" reaction when I look in the mirror at my current "motherly" figure. That would be the child itself. The little, unborn, kicking, spinning kid inside me. Ummm... yeah. Because NOTHING ruins the mood more than having the little one start kicking around in there during foreplay. I either get fascinated and want Brian to feel the baby too, or I get the "giggle effect". You see, I don't even let the cats in the bedroom when we're planning some "grownup snuggle time." I'm just not into that whole exhibitionist thing. And somehow anytime the little one starts kicking around in there I have this horrible "heeeeeere comes DADDY!" thing run through my head at the prospect of us having sex. Which TOTALLY ruins it. Nuh-uh. It ain't happenin' after that.

Of course post-sex, I had another thought run through my head... You know, adding some personality to those little spermy guys that just headed on in there...

"Hey guys... um... someone oughta tell the foreman or somethin', 'cause this job? It's already DONE!"

Yes, my mind DOES work in strange and sometimes abnormal ways. And now I've just given my in-laws potentially more insight into their son's sex life than they ever really wanted to know too. I think I'd better stop typing for tonight.

G'night!

Current Mood: weird

Spin! (and other things we've been up to)

Yesterday we got to go to the park with some others from one of our mom's groups. The weather was awesome and the couple of hours we spent flew by faster than seemed possible. Jareth had his first go on a tire swing while we were there too...

He totally loved it and afterwards it took him a good couple minute before the poor guy could manage to actually stand he was so dizzy! Nonetheless, he went back for more later. The kid sure loves to spin!

After that, we had errands to run so we stopped off for a "quick" lunch first. By "quick" I mean an HOUR. Because, unlike most days, we were actually in a restaurant (the best hot dogs ever) during lunch hour! Whoa. Busy. I think both Jareth AND I were overwhelmed by the sheer number of people and the commotion involved. I know he was. He passed out in the car pretty quick after we left. I ended up going to the bank drive through and then going to an out-of-the way spot for gas because I wanted to let him get some sleep time in and I knew the gas was cheaper there.

I had some pyscho woman in the car behind me all but run me down on the way there, however. She got on her cell like she was calling the cops on me or something while she waved and flicked me off for slowing down. There was less than FIVE FEET between the front of her car and the back of mine, and I really don't think that I'm exaggerating! The person in front of me was going a little slow to begin with - just under the speed limit - so it wasn't like I could zoom up to get away from her or anything. The bitch just decided to ride my ass down this long road and get pissed at me. I tried slowing down a little and tapping my break lights to let her know she was too close. I tried waving at her to back off. Finally, I got scared enough that she was going to hit me that I slowed down to about 30 mph and kept it there, despite the fact that I could see her having a freaking seizure over it in her driver's seat. I'm sorry lady, but I had my two-year-old in the car and I'm pregnant! I was NOT going to let you smash into the back of my car and total it at 50 or even 40 mph! You were TOO DAMNED CLOSE! I couldn't see most of her hood in the rearview mirror, much less her headlights! Egads!

We arrived safely, thankfully, and then ran most of our errands. We bailed on the least important one of them as between the park and the other errands I overdid it, stressing out my hip and back. By the time we got home it was all I could do just to get the groceries and Jareth inside the house.

Today, it was rainy and grey, contrasting yesterday entirely. I opened the back door while I was making lunch, however, and let Jareth have his wish to "watch rain?" out the glass storm windows on the screen door. He's my little boy sometimes. I think he would have rather spent most of the day camped out in front of that door, just watching the rain fall. He did spend part of it camped out on ME though, instead, and took about an hour nap in my arms. While that meant that the stuff I had intended to get done during his nap didn't end up happening - I wouldn't trade it for the world!

More later maybe. I'm contemplating maybe doing the NaNoWriMo this year. If I'm going to, I'd better decide soon! It's already begun. If I want to get 50,000 words in, I've missed 4 days of writing time already. We'll see. I know a couple of people I link to on my blogroll are doing it. I'd link them, but Brian's home now and we've got to get some dinner together. Maybe later or tomorrow.

Later!

Current Mood: contemplative

Rest Day...

I took the day off today. Not from my "mommy duties" of course, and actually I did more dishes and cooking today than I did all last week while I was sick. But the rest of the day was spent playing with my son, playing computer games, or watching some TV I'd recorded. There was "me time" in there. That's one of those things I don't get a lot of and I expect to have even less of when the next baby comes. I mean, I shower all the time but I haven't had a proper bubble bath in ages. Gotta schedule one in there one of these days. Before we use up all the Mr. Bubble ® on Jareth's baths instead!

Normally, I don't allow myself to really just camp out in front of my computer or the television for recreation during the day with the exception of some small breaks here and there. Even when I'm not feeling well I tend to be more likely to sit in front of my computer and clean out my e-mail inbox or run some anti-virus stuff instead of doing anything that I actually find relaxing. And I rarely camp out in front of the television. Except for those first three months after Jareth was born when he wouldn't sleep and wanted to be in my arms 24-7. Then, the television was the only thing left keeping me somewhat sane while I was stuck in one place with my arms full of a cat-napping infant. I'm keeping my eyes open for shows to start recording in the weeks before the next baby is born, so that I'll have some hours of stuff already queued up for the times when there's nothing that interests me on live TV. There's a LOT of TV out there I DON'T like, for a variety of reasons and I seem to recall I didn't even have a hand free for the mouse on my computer for much of the day last time around. We'll see how it goes with the next one.

When Brian got home, we decided to rent a movie. I do have a headache now though, as watching too much TV in one day will often do to me for some odd reason. At least I know it was because of watching TV itself instead of the movie we watched or anything else. I'd say it was something with my eyes, but every time I've gone in to have them checked I've been fine. I finally got someone to prescribe reading glasses a while back but I have so little time to read these days that the prescription is probably out of date by now. It was such a weak prescription anyway that I don't think I want to pay the money to get my eyes checked out again. I'll get around to it again maybe when we have insurance that will help out or something, but not right now. I've got too many other places where the money is needed.

The movie, was Kingdom of Heaven. Originally, I wasn't sure if I was interested in seeing this film, as I feared the subject matter might leave me grating my teeth. While I understand that religion has often been a topic that wars were purportedly fought over (although more often money and land has always been the real reason), the Crusades were particularly brutal. After seeing a particularly good trailer for the movie, however, I added it to the list. Especially after seeing that it was directed by Ridley Scott. I really enjoyed Gladiator, and I see he also directed Black Hawk Down, which was another movie I thought I wouldn't like so much but found myself awed by. I mostly remember that movie for it's cinematography. There was some similar "awe factor" in Gladiator for me too, where scenes just felt like they were seen from the right angle, or the camera managed to capture the essence of the moment by pointing out something that would be otherwise unnoticed.

Kindgom of Heaved was definitely not a disappointment. I do have to say that it felt like it got off to a slow start, setting up a lot of things in the beginning before getting to the "meat" of the movie. I think it did all need setting up, however, so I'm not complaining. My only real complaint was the way passage of time was neglected. I had no way of judging how much time had gone by for the characters between scenes, something I found distracting and a little frustrating. Otherwise, the movie was excellent. I do like the way that the battle scenes were depicted - gore was implied but not gratuitously shown. I got plenty of feel of there being violence and death from the fights, and blood splattered a-plenty, but we never had a moment where we actually saw anyone's leg go flying off or innards come spilling out. I appreciate this in a war film, I really do, and I thought it was handled especially well in this one.

I do have to wonder just how much of it was fact and how much was fiction. There were specials on the dvd and maybe we'll get to them, but it's unlikely. We tend to watch stuff like that right after the film, and there wasn't time tonight to watch more. There is something on the dvd done by the History Channel that might shed some light on it though. Often the romances and some of the friendships are made up to enhance the movie with these type of films. Sometimes the characters are just based on real ones and have different names entirely. It seemed too big an event being depicted to have done that entirely, however. I might be curious to look it up or watch the extra feature. Or, I may get distracted and not get around to it unless we pick up a copy of the dvd for ourselves at some point. While I enjoy watching history stuff and other educational programs, I rarely sit down specifically to do so for some reason. Maybe I'll do some of that if I get stuck on the couch for three months again too.

Anyway, I liked it. 'Nuff said. If you haven't seen it yet, it's a worthwhile two and a half hours. Except for some. Even with the battles done so nicely, I still was glad that Jareth wasn't watching the screen for this one. He doesn't understand the concepts yet, of what was going on and it was still more violence than I want him watching. It got it's "R" rating for "strong violence and epic warfare" and they ain't kidding.

Didn't I just say "Nuff said" or something? Yeah... um... okay, this time for real then. Now you know how little I bother editing the stuff I put up here! It comes tumbling out of my mind, through my fingers, and onto my screen. Bah. Ramble, ramble, ramble. That'll do for tonight.

G'night!

Current Mood: relaxed

Whoosh-Whoosh-Whoosh-Whoosh...

That would be the sound of my unborn baby's heartbeat. "Whoosh-Whoosh" it goes. I got to hear it tonight finally. Not only that, but because of how the timing on the appointment happened to work out, Brian got to hear it too. So did Jareth, but his little mind isn't quite ready to wrap its mind around his future of being a "big brother" just yet. I keep tellin' him there's a baby in my tummy, but he just laughs and wants to sit on my lap. I don't think he's noticed yet that he's already slid down a bit from where he used to get to snuggle and that my tummy has recently been growing. I'm curious how he will react as I get bigger and the little "kickadee" inside me (Jareth had that name for a while too, when I was pregnant with him) gets more obvious to the rest of the world. At one point with Jareth we were visiting with friends and could literally watch ripples across my tummy from him moving around inside. Looked kinda like something out of one of those Alien movies, actually, but was also really neat because I knew it was my child doing it.

On the 10th, we go for the ultrasound! We'll get our first peek at the new little one and maybe even get an idea of what gender the baby is. Last time we had names picked out by the ultrasound. That means that I now have a bit of a countdown going on the name-choosing. Time to pull out the notes I was taking on names I liked and get back to it. We literally chose Jareth's name as we sat waiting to get the ultrasound done. We have 8 more days to work on possible names, and then the following morning it's choosing time. We ought to have one ready for both possible genders. Of course there's no saying we can't change our minds in the time between then and March. Just that we didn't last time.

The new doctor I saw is... well, she's better than that other guy was, so that's an improvement. As Brian put it - she doesn't really understand me. But at least she did have a couple suggestions to try for some of the problems I'm having. It's a step in the right direction. She also gave me answers on why a few things are happening, like some pain I'm having in my abomen and a patch of skin on one thigh that feels like it's been rubbed raw even though it hasn't. For the latter, it's a nerve the baby is likely sitting on. For the pain in the abdomen, it's because it's a second pregnancy. I guess my body isn't holding me together as well now that I already have stretch marks from the previous pregnancy. I'm not sure I entirely understood it, but at least it puts my mind at ease for the moment. I might get more answers on that one from the ultrasound too.

Next visit I'll also get tested for the gestational diabetes. Knowing that it might be coming might have me on a chocolate binge over the next month. I made brownies tonight, but then class didn't go so well and I needed comfort food. More on that another time though. I don't feel like ranting about my teacher tonight - I already told Brian all about it. And he even went and got me eggs so I could make the brownies. Some days my husband is a saint for putting up with me!

G'night!

Current Mood: loved